高考书面表达专练 事件描写 (Describing Something That Happened) )
美文欣赏
It happened to be a beautiful summer afternoon, and Mr. Phillip was taking a walk in the downtown area of Paris, capital of France.When he turned to a street corner, he heard the voice of a lovely French singer coming from a nearby restaurant. The sweet music attracted him, so he went into the restaurant to hear it better.
这篇228字的 这篇228字的 228 短文讲述了一 个带有滑稽色 彩的小故事, 彩的小故事, 在轻松的一笑 之后, 之后,我们还 应该看到它具 有典型的“ 有典型的“事 件描写”特征: 件描写”特征:
Mr. Phillip sat down quietly at a table near the door. Noticing the waiter come over, he ordered a glass of French wine’ The waiter returned with the glass of wine and put it on the table. Mr. Phillip started drinking the wine slowly and watched the other people in the restaurant. There were three customers sitting at a table near him. He could tell by their accents that one of them was an American, one an Englishman and the third man was a funny-looking stranger. The polite waiter served each of the three men a glass of beer. By chance, each glass had a fly in it.
Who--Mr. Phillip and the other three; Whena beautiful summer afternoon; Wherea restaurant in Paris; Whatsomething funny; HowMr. Phillip watched the three drinking beer.
Out of curiosity(好奇心 Mr. Phillip 好奇心), 好奇心 watched carefully what they were going to do. To his amusement, he found that each of them took quite a different attitude. The American picked up his glass, took a hard look at the fly, and then poured the fly and half of his beer on the floor. The Englishman looked into the glass, noticed the fly and reached for a spoon, with which he took the fly out of the beer and drank the rest of it. And the stranger noticed the fly in the beer, picked it with his fingers, squeezed(捏紧 carefully in order to 捏紧)it 捏紧 save every drop of the beer, and then drank it up.
其次, 其次,我们应该注意 短文中用了基本上不 重复的34个动词和8 34个动词和 重复的34个动词和8 个非谓语动词, 个非谓语动词,使得 整个事件动静结合, 整个事件动静结合, 可读性强。 可读性强。 同时, 同时,作者在描述三 人对同一事件的处理 上也各有不同, 上也各有不同,颇有 民族特色。 民族特色。 另外, 另外,短文的结尾干 净利落,出乎意料, 净利落,出乎意料, 令人忍俊不禁的同时 又很想知道: 又很想知道:第三人 是哪国人? 是哪国人? 推荐背诵文段
常用表达法

  1. 写作技巧 叙述完整5 Ws)
  1)叙述完整5个W(5 Ws): Who, What, When, Where, How,(Why) 描写生动3要点( description)
  2)描写生动3要点(Vivid description): Using different verbs; Using verbs; Using proper prepositions. 写好开头与结尾(
  3)写好开头与结尾(A good beginning and a good ending) ending) beginning引人入胜 A good beginning引人入胜 回味良久 A good ending 回味良久 时态语态要贴切( voices)
  4)时态语态要贴切(Good tenses and proper voices)

  2.表达技巧

  1)用好过渡词 用好过渡词,
  1)用好过渡词,使文章前后连贯 表示时间过程的: (
  1) 表示时间过程的: now, then, afterwards, five minutes later, soon, before long, after supper, to this day, just now, just then 表示前因后果的: (
  2)表示前因后果的: because, because of, since, thanks to, so, as a result, thus ,therefore, luckily, unfortunately

  3)表示同等并列的: 表示同等并列的: and, also, as well as, and then (
  4)表示解释说明的: 表示解释说明的: that is to say, for example, and so on, such as, according to, for this reason

  2)把握两个原则,
  2)把握两个原则,用好不同时态 把握两个原则 一致”的原则:在同一时段中的动作、 (
  1)“一致”的原则:在同一时段中的动作、 状态等应该用同一种时态, 状态等应该用同一种时态,形成一种并列结 构。 误:He had gone to the market, buys some flowers and then returned home. 正:He went to the market, bought some flowers and then returned home.
误:He will go abroad after he finishes his high school education and studies there until doctor’s he gets his doctor s degree. 正:He will go abroad after he finishes his high school education and (will) study there doctor’s until he gets his doctor s degree.

  2)“呼应”的原则:在同一句话中或 呼应”的原则: 在同一段文段中, 在同一段文段中,一般不能产生时态的 跳跃” 应形成一种呼应状态。 “跳跃”,应形成一种呼应状态。 误:He said he has been there for three days and he will leave the next day. 正:He said he had been there for three days and he would leave the next day.
规则一:和一般过去时“呼应” 规则一:和一般过去时“呼应”的时态应 该是过去完成时、 该是过去完成时、过去将来时或过去进行 时。 误:He has lived in this old house since he had been a child and he would move into a new house soon. He works in an office not far from his new house. 正:He has lived (has been living)in this old house since he was a child and he will move into a new house soon. He works in an office not far from his new house.
规则二:和现在完成(进行) 规则二:和现在完成(进行) 呼应” 时“呼应”的时态不应该是过 去完成时或过去将来时, 去完成时或过去将来时,反之 亦然。 亦然。
写作练习
(NMET
  98)五月三日, (NMET
  98)五月三日, 五月三日 你参观了一个农场, 你参观了一个农场, 请根据下列图画用 英语写一篇日记。 英语写一篇日记。 注意: 注意:
  1.日记须包括所有
  1.日记须包括所有 图画的内容, 图画的内容,可以 适当增减细节, 适当增减细节,使 日记连贯; 日记连贯;
  2.词数100左右 词数100左右。
  2.词数100左右。
May 3rd suny It’s a lovely day today! The students of our school visited the Red Star farm. In the morning, we get together at the gate of the No.1 Middle School, then full of happy, we were singing and laughing on our way to the farm. We walked and arrived at the farm nearly at noon, there we received a warm welcome. After that, the farmers guided us to see many kinds of vegetables, telling us a lot of knowledge about those plants, asking us to taste some fresh fruites.
日记格式; 日记格式; suny应为 应为Sunny 应为 farm也应大写为 也应大写为 Farm 记述过去,应为got 记述过去,应为 on our way 改为 all the way更好 更好
telling 与asking用 用 得好
In the middle of the day, we had a picnic on the farm, talking with each other. Then we held a small party, singing and dancing with the beautiful music. Time also flies quickly, we had to say goodbye to the farmers. Twilight was falling as we returned to our school. Night is coming, I am still excited about the visit today, washing to have a second chance to visit the farm again.
with 应为 应为to also多余 多余 结尾较好。 结尾较好。但有 两处不妥: 两处不妥:
  1.washing似为 似为
  1. wishing之误 ; 之误
  2.a
  2. second chance与 again 与 意义重复。 意义重复。
参考范文
May 3 Sunday Fine Today we visited a farm. Early in the morning we met at the school gate and went there together. The farm workers gave us a warm welcome. Then the head of the farm showed us around. How glad we were to see the crops and vegetables growing well! At noon we had a picnic lunch in the sun-shine. After a short rest, we had great fun singing and dancing, telling jokes or stories. Two of us even played a game of chess. The time passed quickly. Before we knew it, we had to say goodbye to the workers.
 

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